271

i think all violence in the world would completely cease to exist if everyone had a garb-el.

think about it.

friends-at-arms and enemies alike would be engaged in a violence-laden slugfest with teeth flying asunder, blood flowing like mothra's menses and bones crunching as if they were composed of compromised balsa wood; all of a sudden, in the midst of a kinisonesque diatribe, a sole, draconian combatant with a crispy ear would scream: "im gonna fuckin' kill you, you stupid, ugly, motherfu-- oh hey! look! the garb-el's startin' up!"

at which point everyone would immediately stop, wrap an arm around their worthy adversary and oooh and ahhh as they stared steadfastly while produce from all corners of the earth entered the metal-mouthed, mesmerizing, worm-screw abyss and oozed ever so purgatively into the whirring leviathan that is the garb-el.

...and peace would once again blanket the universe, one beet at a time.