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the importance of active verbs cannot be understated in the world of effective professional writing. i owe susan jacobs a huge educational nod for vastly improving my technical writing skills.

the back label of my "santa cruz" organic limeade bottle boasts the following consumer guarantee:

"our third-party certification program is your guarantee that our products are grown and processed under the strictest organic standards. our independent third-party certification agency is quality assurance international. look for this seal to guarantee you are getting quality organic products."

lets rewrite this guarantee using nifty, active verbs, shall we?

"we guarantee through third-party certification that we grow and process our products by applying the strictest organic standards. we proudly employ quality assurance international as our third-party certification agent. look for this seal to guarantee that you will receive the highest quality organic products."

now thats an appealing and enthusiastic guaranfuckintee.


now if only someone would hire me and pay me big money big money big money no whammies.